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A Blonde and a Brunette are late for work and so the Brunette, who is driving, tells the Blonde to look out the back window to see if the cop's where following them while they speed to work. Cincinnati Reds jerseys store
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"Do you see the cop's yet?" asked the Brunette. "Yes" said the Blonde. "Are they close?" asked the Brunette. "Yes" said the Blonde. "Are they going to pull us over?" asked the Brunette. "I don't know" said the Blonde. "Well are their light's on?" asked the Brunette. The Blonde replies "Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes ...."

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The 20 Year Old Headache
There was a man who had had a headache for twenty years and was at the point where he wanted to end his own life,ED Hardy Mouse Mats
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No doctor could solve his problem, until finally one of them said "You have a very rare problem, your testicles are pressed up against your spine causing your headache. The only way to remedy it is to remove your testicles."

The man hesitantly agrees and gets them removed.

Spare Time
A 35-year-old girl named Pheobe had a heart attack. When she was in the hospital, she had a near-death experience. Men's-Ralph-Lauren-Classic-Fit-Polo-11
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Bobby-joe was riding in Jeds truck

Jed pulled over, got out and pointed down yawnder and said, "Thats where I first had sex."

Bobby-Joe said,"How was it."
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Jed said,"It was great til' I looked up and saw her mom was watching."

Bobby-Joe yelled,"Oh shit, what did she say??"

Jed repiled "Baaa"

A redneck family are visiting a big city for the first time.

The father ans son are in the hotel lobby when the spot an elevator.

"What's that Paw?" The boy asked.

"I ain't never did see nothin' like that in my life" Replied the father.

Seconds later an old frail woman walks in the hotel door and hobbles to the elevator. She presses the button with her cain, waits for the doors to open and gets in.
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The father and son, still amazed by this contraption, continue to watch.

They hear a ping noise and the doors open again. Out steps a beautiful 20 year old busty blonde.

The father looks at his son and says "Go get your Maw !"

What do you call an afghan virgin
Mever bin laid on

How did Burger King get Diary Queen Pregnant?
He forgot to wrap his whopper.

If a firefighters business can go up in smoke, and a plumbers business can go down the drain, can a hooker get layed off?


A New Zealander walking along the road with a sheep under each arm.
He meets another New Zealander who says "you sheerin' mate?" and the first guy replies "naw, they're all mine"
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Why does a squirrle swim on its back?
To keep its nuts dry

What do you call a lesbian dinosaur
A lickalotopis

A man is driving happily along when he is pulled over by the police. The copper approaches him and politely asks, "Have you been drinking, sir?"
"Why?" snorts the man. "Is there a fat bird in my car?"